You may be saying to yourself “why is Matt blogging about Marriage, he hasn’t even been married for 10 years. Who does he think he is giving anybody advice!” If your thinking that I just want to let you know that I don’t claim to be an expert and I am learning each day. Am I perfect? Not at all!! I’m just a man, a father, and a husband that has chosen to lead by example and to put away my old ways in order to PURSUE Christ and lead a family 24/7.
It still amazes me that almost 50% of all marriages will end in divorce. That means one of two marriage covenants will be broken, tossed to the sidelines and forgotten. Families will be torn apart. Interesting is the typical reasons given for ignoring the marriage covenant : communication problems, money, incompatibility, changed lifestyle desires and less common, plain infidelity. One study said the main reason given was simply that the couple (family) simply “grew apart”. I have a more direct answer that probably explains the deterioration of covenant relationships. The family memebers stopped protecting their unity as a family. They slacked off on their responsibility to their partners. Being served became more important than serving others. And finally, there was no one or nothing left to actually support the relationship. The foundation, the commitment, the covenant was gone, and ignored. The result is the tragedy of a broken family with its witness and testimony gone.
Why did God make families? God knows our need for relationship and intimacy. “And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone”. (Genesis 2:18a) When God expressed that it is not good to be alone, He used a word that gives the picture of a branch separated from the tree, or a body part missing from the body. We could paraphrase this; it’s not a good thing for the man to be alone, like a severed arm from its body.
He knows that He placed within our souls the need and desire to have relationships. We are made in His image, and the best description of the kind of intimacy God wants is the permanence and security of a marriage and the family.
Someone once said that marriage is like a Convenience store, not much variety, but at 3AM, it’s always there. God knows our need of the kind of intimacy we can trust and count on.
What are the keys to having a healthy home and family? The first key is a healthy family has God as the foundation Ephesians 5:1. Our families need to be formed by God and fashioned to follow God, not governments.
The next key to having a healthy family is a commitment to submission. (Ephesians 5:21) Here is a blinding flash of the obvious! In a healthy family everyone can’t do whatever they want!
The third key a healthy family has is to promote loyalty and faithfulness (Ephesians 6:1) Trust is built over time and through trials. People, especially in families, need the security of knowing others will not take their place. The forth key to a healthy family experience is good parenting. (Ephesians 6:4) Good parenting takes the effort of both parents and children. During the teen years, when an increasing amount of personal accountability is promoted, a team mentality is very helpful. Finally, a healthy family forgives easily. You can’t live in the past. We must move on past the hurt and pain of disappointing losses. This is where the difference between forgiveness and trust is most obvious. Given or received forgivness is some of the strongest most potent medicine. I hope we all can get our hands on some.
The foundation of society and life is the family. Count on it. God said to do it that way. Of all the relationships that we will live in, the most precious, important, and sacred will be your family. It needs the most attention but it will bring the most results!
If you enjoyed this article, Like it/Share it/ Comment/ and don’t forget to enter your email to get free updates!
Love you all,